Leaving 2008 Behind and Looking Forward to 2009 Pt I

Wow 2008 flew by! Its so crazy, and this year wll flyby too. Soon I'll be an old man lol Personally 2008 wasn't one of my best. I went through alotta bad times and I don't think I healed from it yet. But right now I'm celebrating a new beginning. And to start the year off I'm going to say goodbye to History.

Heartless
It's so crazy, because at one point I considered you to be my second best friend. I gave you so much and never ever asked you for nothing. But you didn't care. That's why I'm calling you Heartless. After all I've done and everything we been through, you fired me. Yes. You fired me. You fired me from your life for stupid reasons. Only God knows why. But yes, you fired me and didn't care. But the real stupid thing is you continued to act like everything is fine and dandy. OH and much props on your Academy Award Winning phone call you gave me that night. I was so shocked that you actually tried to blame me for what ever reasons and THEN you tried to put me down. NEWS FLASH! You are not P. Diddy! You are such a diva! YOU NEED TO WAKE UP! I'm not even dissing you man. But you need to really check yourself. It really hurt my feelings when you told me I "wasn't good enough." I was like 'wow, my really close friend, the one I shared alotta stuff with, the one I could depend on, he is up here putting me down.' For a second I couldn't even recognize you. So we stopped talking. And after months and months I try to fix the situation. I don't know why because all you ever did was use me. Well guess what? In 2009, please don't call me for nothing. I will not be used by you anymore. I'm freeing myself and it feels good. Don't think of it as me being mean, just heartless, because that's exactly how you treat me. Goodbye.

Two-Face
For the last two years I did nothing but give great guest service and used my experience to benefit all. I was the best you had but when I applied for promotions you gave it to someone else. And not just anyone else, oh no, you gave it to people that had little to NO EXPERIENCE at all!! Everytime I think of you I get sick. You smiled in my face. "You're a ROCKSTAR!" Right. But I gotta hustle for hours and I have no input in any matters. Some rockstar. Eventually I gave my two weeks notice so I could focus on school. When you found out I was quitting NONE OF YOU TALKED TO ME FOR A MONTH (those two weeks and then some). I thought it was strange, I at least thought you would want me to stay. So when I did come back YOU TOLD ME I COULDN'T. THAT was a slap in the face. I'm not brand enough? How you mean?! I was devastated but whatever. And now whenever I see you, I smile back and say hi, just as fake and as two-faced as you, cause on the inside, my alter ego is screaming and thrashing about, wanting to say a few choice words. I have a feeling that me saying goodbye to you will be nearly impossible. So I won't say it. Terry just won't ever go back. But Terrence will. Don't talk to me or smile at me cause I will let you know about yourself.

M.I.A.
It's so hard saying goodbye to the love of my life. Yes, LOVE. I didn't really realize it until recently but I love you. That explains everything right? Right. So why am I saying goodbye? Because you are always M.I.A. When I first met you, when you introduced yourself to me, I felt something, a conncetion. And whenever I'm with you I feel it again. It's so strong and I feel that you feel it too. But M.I.A., baby I gotta tell you, I'm sick and tired of you disappearing on me! You know Enough was about you right? And my smash hit single Bliss (Available Now on iTunes) was as well. I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU ALL YEAR and now you wanna try to show the hell back up? I call you ten, twenty, eighty times. You can't return none of my calls? I make an EFFORT! I want it to work, I want US to work, and you may very well want the same. But it takes work. I can't do it all by myself. I love you but I hate loving someone that doesn't give a damn about me....so......*sigh and closes eyes* this is really really hard for me. Part of me is screaming LET YOU GO AND MOVE ON! But there's still this other side that's saying give you another chance. I'm so freaking confused....................Maybe if you stop goin all M.I.A. on me, maybe I won't say goodbye after all.

This concludes Part I of Leaving 2008 Behind and Looking Forward to 2009. Stay tuned for Part II!

Icebreaker

I wrote, well started writing a new song today. It's called Icebreaker. It [like the large majority of my work] is based on a true story. What drove me to write this song was an awkward moment I had today. I refused to become your victim, again.

Flashback.....it was awkward, looking back, for me to break the ice. I mean, we didn't even know each other. I didn't even know your name. But the way you kept looking at me, mmmmm, it gave me courage and the green light. I quickly got caught up. But soon as I spoke up, as soon as I show some interest in you, you wanna get detached, leaving me feeling....well, awkward. And so fast-forward to the present. Same ol, same ol from you. I wanna feel pressed but not this time. If you wanna talk, you know where to find me. So I ignored you. It felt good because I knew you was looking at me. I could feel you looking at me. It felt bad. I felt terrible because it's not like me to give someone the cold shoulder. I guess you taught me well, right?

Icebreaker, it might make the cut to Love Letters, IDK. WE SHALL SEE.

It's not fair

It's not fair that I'm your friend when you need something or when it's convenient for you. I hate how you operate. You think you're so slick, so smart, so the ish. But it's all good. Divas usually don't have too many friends anyway, and in your case I was it. It's not fair how I gave so much to you and never asked for nothing. And now you act as though you don't remember those good ol' times. But I guess I was the one who was stupid, choosing you over the people that truly matter. Ha, I'm laughing to myself cause if you ever read this, you probably wouldn't even know this was about you. Always the victim right? Why don't you take a look in the mirror and stop pointing your finger at everyone else. I hope you're blessed cause you left me with too much stress. I wanna say we're cool but honesty is key.

Hate

1. I hate it when people discriminate against other people.
2. I hate prejudice, racism, sexism, homophobia, come on this is the 21st Century after all.
3. I hate feeling used.
4. I hate that things turn out the way they do but what can I do to fix it?
5. I hate hate.
6. I hate loving someone who doesn't care.
7. I hate struggling.
8. I hate you but I don't mean it.
9. I hate being judged, misunderstood and persecuted.
10. I just hate how you don't want to understand.

Random BlahBlahBlahs

1. Things are kinda weird right now.
2. I am a hardworker.
3. I am a hardworker but it's so much easier for me to be lazy.
4. I can't keep denying the way I feel about you.
5. I am excited about my song being on iTunes.
6. I should be in jail.
7. I should be in Hell.
8. I give the best of me and all I get in return is heartache.
9. You have some nerve.
10. I wish I could make it better for you but I can't.

Get it Girl

What can I say? The broad is FIERCE!! LOL Shout out to the white girl dancing with her and much love to the live Go-Go Band playing.

Hey everyone! YES Bliss has been re-released on SoundClick. When you get a chance, please stop by and listen to it.

What's Goin on With ViN Rawli Muzik?
I got two rock songs I'm workin on and a few more gems for the album. I dont know if Im still gonna release it Summer 2009 or Fall. It all depends on how good a job my Team does in getting the word out. I'm also working on a brand new demo that I'm sending out hopefully SOON. More on that later. Well its recording time so Ill blog some more later!

Love Letters Track Listing (Update)

Love Letters by Terry Rawlins
Courtesy of ViN Rawli Muzik, Inc.
Release Date: Summer 2009 (Unreleased)
Genre: Electro-Pop, Hip-Hop/R&B, Rock

1. One Day
2. Is it You?
3. Magic
4. Wish Her Well
5. Technorock (Luv Junkie)
6. Nostalgia
7. A-E-I-O-U (This Is How I Feel)
8. Haterland
9. (Love You) Forever
10. Frostbite
11. Supa Villain (Untouchable)
12. Enough
13. Bliss (Break Up, Make Up)
14. (This One's) For You
15. Faerie Tale Ending

Acceptance

I'm gonna fail this test so bad. And I'm gonna fail the class too. Acceptance.

Target doesn't want me back. They were using me the whole time. Acceptance.

I can't trust my own friend? Something just ain't right about that situation and I will get to the bottom of it. Acceptance.

I won't get no sleep until tomorrow night. Acceptance.

You can't bootleg everything. Acceptance.

I'm broke. I'm penniless. Acceptance.

Love Letters must be a huge success. Or else. Acceptance.

My Brand Isn't Good Enough

Ya know, for a second, for a minute, for a few days...I really thought I would enjoy going back to Target. But I was sadly informed a few hours ago that I wasn't welcome back. In fact, it would be in my best interest to stay away. My brand isn't good enough. I never smile. My overall work experience for Target was poor. [On a side note, most of you would blow up at this point]. THey felt that when I left, I left because I had enough. When my former boss was telling me all of this, I didn't get mad. I could only feel one feeling.

Hurt.

For the last two years I sacrificed for that store. If my brand isn't good enough; the brand that takes crap and sucks it up, the brand that gives great guest service, the brand that encourages other team members, if that brand ain't good enough then NO BRAND IS SAFE.

I was so hurt because he told me that it was a group decision to not allow me to come back. That means that they ALL agreed that my performance was not up to par. You gotta be kidding me rite? I was there when they didn't have no one else, remember? I covered them so many times and was I ever TRULY REWARDED? I was GSTL (Guest Service Team Leader) for a whole summer and did they promote me? NO! They brought some women in from out side the corporation and they didn't even think anything of it.

Oh yeah I was devastated but you know what? I won't hold a grudge. I just gotta move on. It just sucks that it had to be like this. Shoot, if they say this about ME, the "rockstar", I would hate to hear what they say about the TRUE legends there, like Mike, and Gerald and Vanessa, Ms Valeria, all of those who are worked hard and over looked.

*Deep Breath and a Sigh*

Being rejected isn't a fun feeling. I tub of ice cream and a movie is in order. Well, maybe Thursday nite when finals are over.

It's been a while so let me update you

Hey ya'll, it's been a while since I sat down and wrote a real blog. Sorry bout that. I have been so busy pumping out art work for this school, its ridiculous lol ya gotta love it. But yeah, I'm takin a short break just to write some thoughts down. Here's a list in the GMoney format ;)

10. Why am I sucha procrastinator?
9. I feel like....I can't trust someone rite now and it's driving me crazy.
8. I whooped @$$ in Brawl last week Friday! Kirby boiiii!
7. Art and drawing in general is getting on my last nerve. I'm a perfectionist but even I know when to call it quits!
6. Wanda Sykes is a lesbian! That's my homie!
5. Can't wait to see my best friend in a week and some days.
4. Wow November is almost over. Hell, 2008 is ALMOST OVER.
3. Terry Rawlins or Terrence McSnilwar for 1298: The Return?
2. Love Letters is looking great. The production is other worldly.
1. I have a stalker. Actually I have three. But it might be the same chick. Or it could be that dude again. IDK

Good Times

Quote of the Day

Tomatoes and cheese??? Sheeeeit!!!
LMAO

S.O.L.

OKAY! Sorry J.Lo but you are S.O.L.!!!!!!!!!!!! lmao

Love Letters Track Listing (Modified)

Love Letters
All Songs Written, Produced, and Performed by Terry Rawlins

Tracklisting (Subject to change):

1. One Day
2. Is it You?
3. Magic (It's Jus' Us)
4. Wish Her Well
5. Technorock (Luv Junkie)
6. A-E-I-O-U
7. Mr. Weather Man (Interlude)
8. Call of the Wild
9. (Love You) Forever
10. Service Needed
11. No Good
12. Supa Villain
13. Enough
14. Bliss (Break Up, Make Up)
15. Faerie Tale Ending

Wowww

Bliss is number 5 in Electronica/Dance and number 18 OVERALL in Electronica!!!! Thanks to you all I can easily advance to number one. Continue to spread the word!

AND A SPECIAL THANK YOU

I would like to personally thank one of my close friends, Michaellllll! He encouraged me to get on SoundClick and NOW LOOK AT ME =] Thanks man! Ill give you free tickets one day lmao =]

Thank you's

First of all I wanna thank God for giving me such talent.

And I would like to thank you all because with out the support of my fans, I would be nothing. Bliss quickly rised to the top of the charts. I know it's only at 29 but thats a major accomplishment! 29 outta 16,000+ songs?!?! Continue to spread the word, I got more music coming. Hopefully by tomorrow I'll be in the top 10 =]

I just made a sick beat that I want my home girl Shanae to get on [it's been a while]. Technorock is still on the way, hopefully I can record the rest this week [but I ain't promising nothing].

Well I gotta do school work now, catch ya laterz =]

-ViN
soundclick.com/vinrawlimuzik

Love Letters Track Listing

Love Letters
All Songs Written, Produced, and Performed by Terry Rawlins

Tracklisting (Subject to change):

1. One Day
2. Is it You?
3. Magic (It's Jus' Us)
4. Wish Her Well
5. Technorock (Luv Junkie)
6. A-E-I-O-U
7. Mr. Weather Man (Interlude)
8. Call of the Wild
9. (Love You) Forever
10. Service Needed
11. Beautiful (Feels Like)
12. Memory Lane (Interlude)
13. No Good
14. Supa Villain
15. Enough
16. Bliss (Break Up, Make Up)
17. Faerie Tale Ending

It's Coming

HOWDY YA'LL! LOL Love Letters is still on the way. In fact I made the album art today. This project was suppose to be released like two years ago but you know what? I DON'T CARE. People gripe at me, but they don't have a clue on how much work it is to put together QUALITY MATERIAL. Yeah, I could easily bring the album by the end of the week. Hell, my first album, a school project entitled My Life: The Musical, took only TWO DAYS to make. But it sounded HORRIBLE [yet extremely hot lol]. Slowly but surely, Love Letters will be here sooner than you know. =]
As I was telling Cam (he's a snowman you know), my goal with this cover was to capture different themes. Obviously, the hearts represent LOVE (the album title IS Love Letters, ya know). All of the stars, comets and lost galaxies represent being mysterious, distant, powerful, and OUT OF THIS WORLD. And the spray painted letters and little paint splatters through out the piece represents Hip Hop. I know I do hybrid work and I never classify under one genre but I gotta give it up for Hip Hop. It's in my roots, in my veins, thats what this album is. No matter how far away I get, Hip Hop is still in the undertones.

Oh it's what YOU do to me.......dedicated to someone special

Have you ever been in a long distance relationship? I have and let me tell you it SUCKS! LOL not the relationship, just the situation and the circumstances. It was hard. It was beautiful. It was sad. It is over. But we're still good friends and I love that. Maybe our time isn't right now. Maybe we can be together one day....I gotta finish school in three years and I'm gone, moving away. Sometimes life is like a good movie, I just can't wait to see what happens next =]

Finally! Been Meaning to do This For the LONGEST!

Hey! Finally uploaded my first video to Youtube. Here's Enough off of Love Letters. Make sure you cop that disc when I release it (and tell a friend or two or three or ten or twenty-eight or......)

You Suckers Got SERVED

Trinity. One of the baddest chicks in film history.







LMFAO at the guy at the end of the last clip! WHAT?!?! He got OWNED. Thats a bad broad!

Passing the Torch

Passing the torch on to the younger generation is very...idk, special in a sense. I am officially free from Target's grasp. Today was my last day. Now I can concentrate on what should be first, education. I wont lie, Im gonna miss the chaos at 1298. I LOVE that place so much. But my season there has come to an end and I must accept my destiny, the newest Sage [LLB].

Speaking of school, pray for me. IDK how I'm gonna make it this week coming up. UGHHH I hate feeling behind. One thing I learned quick is you shouldnt get behind on art work because you will die lol........................................no joke, Im suffering the consequences.

Im sleepy zzZ

Keep Your Head Above Water Pt 2.

Im behind in everything right now. Well maybe not EVERYTHING...ughhhh Im so stressed out. I can't wait til Christmas Break =] Imma be up outta this joint. I gotta get away.

This school work load is soooo demanding. I gotta producing outstanding art like every week. AND I got a midterm exam on Monday, which I'm going to fail by the way =[ IDK anything in that class. But it's ok, maybe God will send a miracle.

Been sick off and on. You tell me it's cuz my immune system sucks, but Im not sure...I ususally dont get sick that often. UGHHHHHHH I cant even look forward to weekends anymore.

EXCEPT THIS ONE! Saturday October 11th will be my last day at Target.

Keep Your Head Above Water

I feel like I'm drowning. I feel behind. I hate feeling behind. Too much work. When will it be over???? I need a break, BIG TIME. IDK when this album will be done. Can't think of nothing else but ART. Music, my first love, is gonna have to wait....for art. Did I make the right decision?

Like my dear brother said earlier today, "I need a break from LIFE." It's funny how I hoped and prayed to get into SCAD, but now that I'm here, I'm thinking "Wow, this is too much work." The standards are sooooo freaking high. I love it, don't get me wrong, I'm just overwhelmed at the moment. IDK what's gonna happen, all I know is I gotta make it. I gotta make it and be the best. SCAD is a big competition ya know. Yo cant just put together some bootleg piece. Naw, you gotta give it your all, 100+% every single time. Pray for me as I pray for you.

Sorry, been gone for a minute

Ughh, lots of stuff on my mind...I put my two weeks notice in at Target on Monday...On October 13th I will be free =] Don't get me wrong, I loved my time at Target but for the most part I felt enslaved, caged, ya know? God has blessed me with something so great that if I did stay I would never be able to express it to the fullest.



See what I mean? It took me a week to draw "Missy Elliott" (8"x8", Stippling, Ink). Imagine if I drew other people, maybe two a week. Do you know how much money I could make???

One of these days.....

...I'm gonna have a music video like this LMAO! In the middle of the club, me and my entourage is gonna break out into some complex riverdance routine, then the whole club is gonna catch on HAHAHAHA!

Is This Love?

I wanna love you and treat you right
I wanna love you every day and every night
We'll be together with a roof right over our heads
We'll share the shelter of my single bed
We'll share the same room [yeah] for Jah provide the bread
Is this love, is this love, is this love
Is this love that I'm feelin?
Is this love, is this love, is this love
Is this love that I'm feelin?
I wanna know, wanna know, wanna know now
I got to know, got to know, got to know now

I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I'm willing and able
So I throw my cards on your table!

Bob Marley was a beast, a man that I can relate to.

It's Becoming So Clear

It's obvious to me now, I know exactly which single to choose. I will be posting a preview sometime SOON. Right now I'm feelin kinda sick...too bad I got class today. I'd rather stay home and sleep lol SCAD is great, LOTS of work but I love it. I'm so blessed, God is good.

Which One Will it Be?

Okay so I narrowed my next single down to two tracks. One is the emo-punk rock track entitled "Techno Rock (Luv Junkie)" and the other sounds like music Dracula would be listening to if he owned a night club. It's called "A-E-I-O-U (This is How I Feel)." Both are very nice tracks and they both serve their purposes.......I just don't know which one I'll put out first. I'll prolly post snippets soon so you all can lemme know how you feel.

OMG! I think I'm getting fat!

Yes, I am gaining weight. It's hard to accept that fact that my metabolism ain't like it use to be. I guess Im gonna have to say goodbye to all my favorites [fat and sugar and salt] lol Naw Im not fat, at least not yet. I just worry about my health because diabetes and other conditions run STRONGLY in my family [on both sides]. I gotta clean it up if i plan on being around for a while.

Good Morning!!

Ughhh I got work today =[ Too much has been on my mind lately. I dont even feel like this today. I gotta drive to Savannah today to start a picture that's due Monday. it's very doable to get done. I just gotta start lol This first week at SCAD was rough, i ain't even gonna lie. But I'm so blessed to be going to such a great school and I thank God for it. I'm taking a L.O.A. from Target [my place of employment]. I might even be quitting soon, IDK, it all depends on them and how they act....

I need a vacation....

About Love Letters

Hey =] For those of you [slow ppl] who don't know, I'm working on a solo album entitled Love Letters. The genre is Alternative/HipHop/Hybrid lol I cross breed, mutate and give birth to my own music. I hate clones. I hate listening to the same things over and over on the radio and then wonder "WTF am I listening to??" SO that being said, when you receive your copy of Love Letters, DO NOT expect your ordinary album. I got a little bit of everything on there.

Hey hey hey

Hello out there! =] Welcome to my blog! The [main] purpose for this site is to provide the world with information on my solo music project entitled Love Letters. I plan to keep you all up to date with previews and samples, news and art, even polls because I want to hear what ya'll got to say. God Bless!